I felt like my whole world was reaped apart when I heard the news about my Granny not being with us anymore. I started to have flashbacks of all the moments spent with her. Flashbacks of what she used to say. I started crying like a small child repeating some of the words she said. It may sound dramatic but the feeling at that moment wasn't dramatic. I kept yelling at my hubby for not letting me spend more time with my Granny when we visited my country. And that I lost all those moments I could have spent with her.
Visit to Nepal
I visited Nepal almost 2 years ago when I came to find out that my granny had cancer and that they didn't know how long she would live. But touch wood she lived longer than we thought she would. My granny died peacefully at the age of 97. Before making the trip I told hubby I wanted to spend more time with my grandma as I didn't know how long she would live. I told him I wanted to celebrate the festival with her after almost 12 years. I cried even at that moment when I got the news about her health. We went there during the festive season and that too in the 2nd year after we tied the knot traditionally in Nepal.
But who knew when I went to Nepal, situation would change, circumstances would change and people would change. That's right I did not get to spend as much time with my grandma as I had initially planned. I wanted to celebrate that festival with her, make plenty memories as I didn't know if it could be the last festival I will celebrate with her. Now that I remember and writing it, I think because I was being pessimistic the universe made it true and that was my last chance to celebrate that festival with her. And even while writing this I regret, I feel sad and feel like crying. I did get to spend some time with her not that I didn't see her at all but I didn't get to spend the quality time I wanted to. On my way back, I cried throughout the whole journey and our seat was next to the air hostess and she looked at me wondering why I sobbed like I was in pain.
